I’m glad we are back! There are so many things I want to blog about, I don’t even know where to begin. I have been paralyzed by stress for most of 2017. The inauguration of doom was exacerbated by our own family drama of unemployment. Job searching when you have a family to support is an emotional roller-coaster. I want to write about that. We tried to use what we had: time. So we went on the family beach trip, visited Colorado for August birthdays, traveled to totality for the eclipse and celebrated our 10th anniversary in TX. I want to write about that too. The veil of stress definitely rob some joy out of most of the moments of the last year. I want to write about that even though it is hard. It turns out I’m an anxious crafter, so I have been prolific this year! I have plenty to write about that. Ellis started public school and Cal started forest school. I want to write about that. The most important thing is I WANT TO WRITE! More to come!
Blogging has been hard for me this year. It’s been hard to talk about craft projects, baby milestones and home décor (and there’s been a lot of it) when I felt that basic human rights and our environment have been threatened. Coupled with a time when I wanted to slow down, savor and soak in all of the time with a baby we know will be our last, it felt like the right decision to put pause on the blog.
The first year with a new baby is all consuming and now that we’re finally sleeping through the night and our little man is able to amuse himself for five whole minutes, I can take a small breath and begin ever so slightly to think about doing something for myself.
I think that all the trite parenting articles have it right when they say that you need to let things go when the new baby comes home but I often wonder are we realistic about how long that period lasts. With Lucas, it was definitely a year before I really felt like we started to find our groove. The last six months with Sean have been exponentially easier than the first six but sleep is a factor second to none. I no longer have to jump into bed the moment their eyelids close and I have a spare hour — even 20 minutes — to take some time for me.
A few months ago we went to a kids birthday party where we caught up with five couples that we spent our 20s with. Every family has 2 kids and we all look worse for the wear. The resounding groan to any inquiry about how people are doing was a reflection of how tired everyone is. These are hectic, busy days and it’s a season of life I wouldn’t give up for the world. I know we’re not alone in that but it has simultaneously been a very isolating time.
That said, it’s important to me to write, to connect with you and to document my experience with these two boys who I hope we’re shaping to make this world better and stronger.
We had an amazing first year full of trips, smiles, milestones, laughter and brotherhood. Thanks for standing by. I missed you much!